We all know that Audrina Patridge is one of our favorites here on JournalStone.com. She has been one of our featured girls since we began the blog about 8 months ago. While she has done her part we still don’t seem to be shooting to the stratosphere in our following although I must admit we are finally starting to garner a loyal few. Damn people, even a few loyal followers are worthwhile. Doesn’t anyone remember Charles Manson? He only had a few subjects but look at what they were able to accomplish with the bonding. OK, bad example but still, we can only pick and choose so often.
Since we are avid Audrina fans it is just logical that we are not so high on Stephanie Pratt. I am not even sure that we have ever featured her here on the site and alas we cannot do so again. We have focused on the third wheel in Heidi Montag a few times but if you have any kind of decent body and pose for Playboy or Maxim you will most likely make it into our blog at some point. We have our standards and they start with showing a little skin, taking a nice photo and allowing us to post it. We admit to being shallow which is the first step in getting your feet wet. Please people, you can’t go to deep and remain shallow. It just seems contradictory.
So with Stephanie Pratt doing a few photos for Maxim the other day and Audrina posting these exclusive photos on her website that will be released in an upcoming British magazine it just seemed natural to compare the two. There is nothing like a little catfight to get the blood flowing for the holidays. I personally would pick a catfight over a snowball fight any day and every day that I was given a choice. A good snowball fight is fine and dandy but two women who are locked in mortal combat as they are being doused in chocolate syrup is like heaven on earth. Throw a cherry on top and you have the perfect Sunday.
Snowball fights can be dangerous I am told so venture forward at your own risk. BBC is reporting that a rogue cop got a little antsy and pulled out his gun when a large group of fanatics starting throwing snow at each other. What in the hell is wrong with these people. Don’t they know that throwing snow can end up hurting somebody? I mean if you threw a snowball at me it is perfectly logical and within my rights as a peace keeping officer to pull my weapon and blow the living shit out of you. Police have feelings too. Maybe the guy didn’t get invited to the party and was sick and tired of sitting at home playing with himself in the dark. Those damn crazy kids.
Sometimes I feel like a nut and sometimes I feel like a cherry. Not personally mind you. I just get hungry now and then and cherries are very very tasty.
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How can you not love Maxim.com? How can you not love the magazine that brings us a plethora of hot women to our doorsteps (or laptops) every waking second of our lives. Don’t get me wrong. Playboy is nice. It has its place. Hustler, well a little graphic for me at times but still to each his own. Hustler does have those stories though. You have to admire the pizza boys in that damn magazine. They are always bringing over the sausage topping and the women just seem to open up the door for those guys. I always wondered how those stories were ever written and who the people were. It was only a couple of years ago that somebody told me they were made up. Shit, there are some things in life that should just never be told.
I also have another question for all you bloggers out there. If I post pictures from Maxim and plug the magazine will I get in trouble? It isn’t like I am taking them for my own. I am attempting to give the article free publicity. Does that count? Maxim.com Maxim.com Maxim.com Go to the site people. It is good. There are half naked women there. Audrina is there with an interview and lots more pictures. Buy the magazine, spend your money to look at Audrina naked. Is that good enough. I know that I don’t normally buy magazines but this one will be on my list. Shit, I know I keep saying this but again I hope the girlfriend is not reading this. Is it bad to buy women’s magazines, or better defined magazines with women in them?
If I were given the choice of sitting at home and watching Glee or going to the store and buying Maxim Magazine I would pick the latter. I have another friend who loves that show. I admittedly have not seen it this season but I can only assume that the magazine would be better. It isn’t a fair comparison really because he is gay and would not garner the same inspiration from a magazine like Maxim that I would.
If you were left alone on a desert island and you had to pick one which one would you pick? Is it possible to pick between the two? Who has the most talent? I do mean acting talent by the way? Audrina? She is doing “Sorority Row”. Could she possible have actual acting talent or does she just look good in a bikini? Can we see her ability to scream and get bludgeoned to death? I don’t know if there is a lot of acting in those movies. There is definitely no singing. Audrina seems to hold very little respect for her partners singing ability as she slams both Heidi and Britney in one fell swoop. I admittedly am not a big Britney fan but one has to admit that the girl has done more than these two combined, times 100.
How much talent does it take to sit around in a bikini, bitching and moaning? There is only so much a guy can take. Why would any sane man listen to this stuff on TV? He can get married and have it in spades front and center. Ahhh, just kidding…… or am I? The only thing I can think of comparing it to would be getting diagnosed with prostate cancer. There are just some places that a knife should never be allowed to go, but go there it does. It seems that we have more and more men getting diagnosed and possibly getting over treated. The Journal of the National Cancer Institute did a study and the results like all studies are ambiguous. Now I know that studies are important to do and lead us in directions. I just wonder if there was ever a study that once complete, gave us a concrete answer? I am just asking.
I wonder if Audrina has ever thought of becoming a doctor. She would make one damn good proctologist. I could see myself going to visiting weekly just to keep things in check. She would have guys lining up outside her door for hours. Damn, now that would be a reality show. Proctology Today. Catchy title. Only one real hole in it. Ahhh, get it. Damn I kill me. Sadly the Duggars kill me too. I am so sick of this reality crap where the more kids you have the more people will tune in to see the haphazard way your raise them. I am fed up with our societal rules that allow this fodder to be aired. I don’t give a crap about free speech when it is such a complete waste of funds. Stop blowing air up my ass, unless we go back to the last point and get Audrina into the business and then well………….. Blow away baby.
If she blows hard enough……………….. Damn it. Stop judging me. You don’t even know where I was going with this. I was going to say if she blows hard enough…………. Shit there you go again. I am not saying she should blow hard or hardly blow but if she blows hard enough we should put her to work in southern CA. Not in the movies mind you but putting out those fires. The just keep burning and burning and burning. It is crazy how bad it is getting down there. One might think there was not enough water to support all the people but what else would Colorado be good for. Somebody has to do the work so we can watch all those movies. You have to love So Cal right.
Does anyone out there read the blogs or do we all just look at the pictures? Sometimes I wonder. I know that some people read them because I get those hateful comments back about my berating of the religious faction know as Catholicism. OK, Don’t get me going again. I am not bashing you guys this time. If you remember correctly I promised to switch to Mormons anyway but I just have had a difficult time keeping my promise. Everyone sees our ads right. Over in the right hand column. I know, nobody clicks on them that is why we don’t make any money at this website but that is besides the point.
