Shopping with your Teenage Daughter

I have to admit to disliking shopping in general. When I walk into a mall it feels like the air is being sucked from my lungs and my energy level drops to near lethargic levels. It must be something about the stale artificial environment with the luminous lighting that lowers the level of energy to a point where you are near comatose. Is it possible that death will be nothing more than a visit to your local mall where you are inundated with loud obnoxious TV’s blaring some rap song about how this little girl was molested at 16 and had a baby? What in the hell is up with that? So as you can see shopping is not high on my priority list but having a teenage daughter and blessed with two additional daughters who are both younger, I am forced to shop now and will be shopping for a while to come.

My teenage daughter in a rare opportunity this week asked me if she could spend a little alone time with just her and I. Her two younger sisters are spending the week in the mountains and other than my girlfriend it was just the two of us. My girlfriend graciously bowed out of the adventure although she is in tune with the entire process and would have been much more adept at perusing the aisles than I was. We entered the mall specifically looking for jeans and to narrow down the selections further my daughter had requested Pac Sun specifically. Unfortunately the mall she chose didn’t have a Pac Sun (I had tried to tell her this) so she went from one store to another attempting to find something that caught her eye.

I can enter a store, buy 5 pair of jeans, go to lunch, catch a movie and step outside for a breath of fresh air all in the time it takes my daughter to even begin the process of trying something on. She as most women shop in some insane way that I will never in my lifetime begin to understand. Lucky for me I had brought some JournalStone magnets and at every register I strategically placed one for future viewing. How intelligent am I? Wait, I am seriously asking. How intelligent am I? Is that worthwhile or just a waste of my time. We managed to get through the evening and finally did purchase a pair of jeans. I was so happy she got at least one pair so the trip wouldn’t be considered unproductive.

I must admit that given the choice I would go shopping with my daughters every day if that was what it took to spend time with them. They grow up so quickly it is hard to believe at times they can turn into little devils. It was probably a bunch of teenage girls who dug up those graves in the historic burial site in Illinois. I think it makes sense. Why bury people with jewelry. Let’s dig them all up and sell the stuff. Is that illegal? In Iran and Iraq don’t they just did these big holes and dump masses in them anyway. It is easier if you keep all the chemicals in one big hole versus spreading it across the country. Most of them died by being mass sprayed anyway. Maybe they should think of that in China. It would be less mess on TV if people just collapsed. The government could blame Piglet Flue. Isn’t that still going around?

Just think what they will bury Michael Jackson with. Now that would be one grave worth digging up. Uh Oh, wait a minute. I think mommy Jackson who loved her son very much will still not want to part with money. Money does rule in the end. Well or maybe it is Jewish people who do. Don’t you love Israel? They just bomb the shit out of anyone they want and don’t really care about political fallout. Sarkozy is begging those damn religious fanatics not to blow up Iran but in the end Israel will do what it wants. I mean didn’t France beg Germany not to hurt it as well. French people do a lot of drinking and begging don’t they? The world might respect them a little more if they just stood on their own two feet and had a backbone.

Jesus wasn’t this blog about shopping. I ended up having a nice time. Got to bond with my daughter a little bit and we then went to see a movie. Can anyone guess what it was? Yes, the Transformers movie that I just wrote about. As with all blogs it wouldn’t be a blog without mentioning Megan Fox, Isabel Lucas and Emma Watson. It would have been such an easier transition if they would have just put Emma in the Transformers movie as well.

Whatever happened to Carrie Prejean by the way? Was she in Illinois digging lately? Is she Catholic?

Related posts:

1. Nothing like back to school shopping.
2. Teenage Summer School
3. Decision time for my Teen daughter
4. Impressionable Minds, that is you people
5. Teenagers know everything, Just ask them.